


Healing Hurts

by IceboundEmu



Category: LoveLink (Video Game)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Falling In Love, Fix-It, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-12
Updated: 2020-12-20
Packaged: 2021-03-09 17:41:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,081
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27530176
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IceboundEmu/pseuds/IceboundEmu
Summary: My attempt at a fix it fix for Lovelink's Blake Bailey.  Spoiler warnings if you haven't played his story, as it starts with his ex and flows from there.Blake resolves never to love again after his happily ever after falls apart, shame he hadn't counted on meeting the MC.
Relationships: Blake Bailey/MC, Keanu Hale/OC
Comments: 2
Kudos: 68





	1. How it all began

**Author's Note:**

> First attempt at posting a work here, questions, comments and feedback are all gratefully received.
> 
> No I don't own these characters, but they rent space in my head and I write these in the attempt to get them to leave.

He couldn’t breathe, he was suffocating.  
  
Struggling to sit up in bed, whilst simultaneously kicking away the blankets that had coiled round him like vines Blake fought an almost unbearable urge to vomit. As he finally freed himself from the smothering embrace of the blankets the cold air of the room hit his sweat slicked skin, the sudden shock bringing his skin out in goosebumps.  
  
Finally he found it in himself to force his lungs to work, drawing in air in a pained, shuddering gasp and praying that he didn’t lose the control he had of his churning insides manged to stagger to his feet and convey himself of shaking legs into the bathroom. He managed a few steps inside, then somehow found himself resting his face against the ceramic tiles of the wall, tears prickling the back of his eyelids of he tried to ground himself.  
  
The sound of the front door slamming broke that particular spell, and the first tears started to fall as his inner voice began once again to scream at him for his inability to manage his life and his heart ached as though someone had ripped it from his chest.  
  
In hindsight he should never have trusted Jordan again. After they’d walked out and in hand with their new love, he’d thrown himself into his work, burying the pain and refusing to acknowledge its existence, arranging for the tattoo he’d so proudly shown off mere months before to be obliterated and telling himself he was fine until he almost succeeded in believing it himself.  
  
Then the gentle prods from his co-workers started, nothing much at first, just a few remarks about how lonely it must be being alone. It evolved into rather more pointed comments about how the quality of his work might improve once he had a partner again and culminated in his resolve crumbling and he agreed, under sufferance to sign up to Lovelink.  
  
Which was turning out to be the biggest mistake of his life. Because after setting up his profile and going through the initial loading screens he found himself staring at the profile of the person he had spent the last six months trying to forget. Then to compound it he had swiped right. As apparently had Jordan.  
  
His second mistake was believing the honeyed words Jordan had poured on him, convincing him that it was all a massive mistake, that he was the only one Jordan had ever loved, that losing him was Jordan’s biggest regret, that what they had was special and that they should try again.  
  
He finally agreed to a date, which in reality had been nothing more than Jordan coming to the flat and them immediately jumping one another, Blake unable to resist the animal urges after six months of forced celibacy and Jordan always knowing which of his buttons to press, but before they’d passed out in bed together Blake had briefly let himself be happy that he’d found this again, daring to dream of them laughing over this speedbump in their relationship in the years to come.  
  
The shock in the morning as Jordan laid out that this meant nothing, that it was one last roll in the hay for old times sakes, had been a knife to the heart. Watching Jordan dress he had found himself in stunned silence, numb and it was only as he watched Jordan’s back vanish through the doorway and down the hall that the crushing, sick sensation had washed in, reducing him to his current state.  
  
He struggled back to his feet, biting back a sob and managed to lurch back into the bedroom, groping for his jeans discarded in a puddle on the floor the previous night. Rooting in the pocket he located his mobile, managed to unlock it with trembling fingers and loaded up Lovelink again. Blake was unsure what he was hoping for, but the automated message that flashed up confirmed his worst fears.  
  
**donotreply@lovelink.app wrote: Jordan has decided to unmatch you, we’re sorry it didn’t work out this time! But don’t worry! There are lots of matches out there just dying to meet you!**  
  
Blake bit down on the bubble of hysterical laughter that rose in his throat at the faux cheer of the message, feeling the tears once again begin to slide down his cheeks as the realisation of the pain he had opened himself up to again began to bite. As he consigned the message to oblivion he swore he would not allow himself to love again.


	2. Chapter 2 - The Muffin List

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Blake weathers the aftermath of his Ex
> 
> Keanu tries to be a good friend
> 
> Muffin's List is introduced

“Keanu, I’m not touching that fucking app again.”

Blake winced and gritted his teeth as he felt the tattoo needle strike a little too close to his hip for his body’s liking. Keanu, ignoring or oblivious to his physical discomfort gave a soft chuckle, lifting the needle from his skin and wiping away the excess ink and blood from his skin and sitting back to admire his handiwork. Blake cursed softly, realising he should have sensed a trap when Keanu had approached him to offer him a custom butterfly tattoo he’d designed, pointing out it would work perfectly with the trail of butterflies that already snaked from his groin to right hip.

“What do you have to lose Blake?”

It had taken three days for him to drag himself back into work after Jordan had left, three days where he’d barely ate, barely slept and wondered whether grief was going to make him lose his mind entirely. When he’d finally staggered into the shop Trish and Keanu had taken one look at him, closed up shop for the day and taken him straight back to their flat and spent the next 48 hours coaxing the whole sordid tale out of him whilst nursing him back to the standard where the customers wouldn’t flee screaming at the sight of him.

Neither of them would let him off reception though to work on a customer. Though the thought of his usual line of work, couples’ tattoos, made him feel sick to his stomach. Something must have showed in his expression when Trish had suggested a commission to him, because the next thing he knew he was lying on his back on one of the tattoo couches with his best friend playing psychiatrist, in as much as he was telling Blake to get back onto the app that had caused all the problems in the first place.

“Apart from what remains of my sanity?”

Keanu laughed again at his dramatic response, covering the fresh tattoo with the protective clear sheet that would ensure the design healed properly.

“I think you lost that when you fell for Jordan’s crap again.”

Blake bristled at that, feeling the tears well up unbidden again and blinking them away furiously.

“That’s not fair!”

“Let’s face it, you knew somewhere in your heart of hearts, that something was up. You didn’t mention a word to Trish or I that Jordan was back in contact did you? You know what we would have said?”

Blake stayed silent, unwilling to admit Keanu had hit a nerve. Trish and Keanu had both loathed Jordan, after the whole messy fallout had blown over, they’d have been furious to know that Blake had agreed to a meeting. He felt sick to his stomach at the sudden paranoia that they were disappointed in his weakness. Something of it must have shown on his face because Keanu’s expression softened.

“…tell you what, let’s not mention Jordan again hmm? But seriously Blake, you need to get out there again. You can’t hide away forever.”

Blake grimaced, stomach twisting into unpleasant knots at the thought of even attempting to meet someone. The thought of loading up the app and running into another Jordan...

“I can survive.”

He bit back on the bile bubbling in the pit of his stomach, motioning at Keanu to pass the bucket they kept for some of the more nervous clients who came in for tattoos. His friend managed to get it to him just in time, leaving Blake with the unpleasant experience of reliving his breakfast. Keanu waited for him to get the retching back under control before playing the next card in his hand.

“I can check any matches on Muffin’s List”

“What the fuck is Muffin’s list?”

Smiling Keanu pulled out his mobile, opening the internet browser before loading up a webpage and turning the screen so Blake could see. His first thought was that he’d finally lost his mind, because it appeared to be a website that had been set up by a cat. Sensing his incomprehension, Keanu stepped in to explain.

“This is Muffin’s List. His owner suffers from anxiety but wanting to meet someone set up an account on Lovelink, using Muffin as their profile. Even this though didn’t stop the Catfish, the serial sexters and all the worst a dating app has to offer. So, they set up this website for other people who might be experiencing similar problems so they can check out who they might be matching with. Now it’s so popular people help to keep it updated and you can request recommendations from Muffin.”

“Okay, so you want me to what?”

Blake hoped that if it seemed he was resistant enough Keanu might just eventually give up and go away. This approach apparently wasn’t going to work today.

“You, nothing, well one thing. Just need an answer to a question”

“What question?”

“Well, since Trish and I completed the application last night for Muffin to recommend you some matches, which one of these looks interesting to you?”

Blake felt sick with terror again.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Blake meets the MC and talks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Having fun messing with the order of Blake's conversation to make this. Hopefully this is a short but sweet addition to the story.
> 
> Assuming you like your sweetness with a serving of angst. Which Blake has in spades.

Keanu and Trish didn’t abandon him to the mercies of the app.

He’d moved from the tattoo couch back into the reception area, though Trish had taken over monitoring reception so that he could talk to his match without interruption. When he’d finally managed to shakily point to a match he found attractive Keanu had taken over the process of getting the match loaded up onto the app, apparently Muffin would contact the lucky selectee to let them know that someone wanted to speak to them, so he’d have the advantage of being pre-accepted.

Trish had made him a cup of tea to soothe his nerves, but he’d shook so badly he’d ended up abandoning it on the coffee table before he caused himself physical injury by dumping it in his lap. Nor did he think it would go down well if he drowned his phone, however accidental.

Putting it off wasn’t making him feel better, he looked down at the screen of his phone, where the conversation screen had been sitting open as he tried to steel himself to make the leap.

_A cat recommended I talk to you._

As openers went, that had to be the worst. Blake was sure he’d just made himself out to be a complete and utter weirdo. Still, he wasn’t unmatched immediately, three dots appeared on the other side of the screen, indicating his match was writing out a response. That was a good thing, right?

_That’s Muffin, he’s a smart cat._ 😊

_You take many dating recommendations from cats?_

_Nope, you’re the first._

_I signed up after talking to Muffin’s Owner._

_They weren’t ready to date, but they said I had a kind heart._

_So, I should help other people like I helped them._

The mention of a date turned his blood to ice.

_I don’t want to date._

_Really? So why are you on Lovelink?_

_My friends wanted me to._

_They said I shouldn’t be alone._

_Why are you alone?_

Blake paused before responding, wondering whether he could get away with smashing the phone and running away. Keanu would probably take him down before he got to the door. But maybe if this match thought he was too much work to fix he could convince them to leave.

_Do you promise you won’t laugh?_

_I promise._

_Go for it._

_My last partner left me for someone else._

_Then they came back, we had one night together._

_Then they left me again._

_It hurt like hell_

_…_

_Who would laugh at that?!_

_I don’t know._

_It’s just so pathetic_

_I don’t ever want to feel like that again._

_Anyone who laughed at that is a complete bastard_

_It’s natural not to want to feel hurt again._

_No. I don’t want to love again._

_The thought of feeling like that again._

_The pain of losing someone again._

_I just can’t._

_Ok._

_Are you happy to carry on talking?_

_Or do you want to take a break for today?_

_I’m guessing it hurt a lot for you to admit that._

Blake started at the message, feeling his eyes flood with tears. He was seized by an almost irresistible urge to scream and fling the phone away, but instead gripped it, white knuckled whilst he waited for the sensation to die down. He heart beat a frantic rhythm as it felt like it was trying to escape his chest.

“Are you okay Blake?”

Trish was looking at him with a worried expression, Keanu had vanished somewhere, though as he watched his friend emerged from the back room with the sick bucket, placing it within arms-reach. Blake guessed his physical condition must have mirrored the mental turmoil, especially when Keanu settled behind him to pull him backwards into a comforting embrace. For what seemed the hundredth time in the past week he sobbed as his friend made soothing noises, waiting for him to relax.

He suddenly remembered the phone in his hand and the match on the other end, still waiting patiently for a response. He looked down at the screen and confirmed yes, the link was still active. Blinking to clear his vision he typed what he hoped was a coherent response, so he didn’t just drop off into dead air.

_That would be…good._

_It’s brought up some bad feelings._ ☹

_I’ll talk to you tomorrow?_

_I’ll be waiting for your message._

_Hope you feel better soon._

Blake closed the conversation screen and the app, then lasted all of about thirty seconds before he started crying again.

He wasn’t entirely sure he was going to survive this experience.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Blake returns for the second conversation he committed to.
> 
> He's only doing this so he can break off this whole sorry mess.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More messing with the timeline of the story conversations. :)

Twenty-four hours later and he still wasn’t feeling 100%.

Blake hadn’t mentioned to Keanu or Trish that he’d agreed to speak to his Lovelink Match again the next day. He was sure if they had they wouldn’t have agreed to let him stay home today. But he didn’t want to begin to associate the place he worked and the job he loved with the intense misery the thought of dating invoked. If he fell down that rabbit hole, he’d never leave the house again.

He’d taken a few steps to try and alleviate some of the discomfort, he’d fashioned himself a nest on the sofa by dragging the pillows and bedding from his room downstairs, as well as stealing all of the cushions that “accented” (Trish’s word, not his) the furniture in the living room. He’d avoided alcohol, knowing in his current mood that it would only emphasise the depressive feelings and that he might end up saying more than he intended to. He’d already decided that this conversation would be their last, he could just politely say he wasn’t ready to deal with this and close the conversation before he got too far into it. Chapter closed, he could get on with his life, they could get back to “helping” people.

With that resolution made he loaded up the app, willing his pounding heart to calm as he opened the conversation.

_You came back!_

Blake was certainly happy he wasn’t in the shop for this, because he was certain he screamed when the unexpected message popped up. He hadn’t been expecting them to be online, somehow in his mind he thought they’d be offline, and he would have to arrange a time to meet up and chat. The idea of having time to prepare had been a comfort, having to deal with it without rehearsal time left him feeling naked and exposed.

The presence of three dots in the lower corner of the screen showed they were already typing another message.

_I honestly wasn’t sure whether you would._

_Even if it’s just to say goodbye, it’s very brave of you._

Blake studied the message uncomfortably, wondering whether they had some sort of psychic ability or had guessed his intentions. Still he remained silent and they continued to type.

_Sorry to second guess you._

_I had some time last night to myself._

_I may have dwelled too much on how I would react in a similar situation._

_But I wanted to make sure you wouldn’t feel bad if you were going to do that._

He realised he probably should add something to this conversation, lest it become a monologue.

_Thanks?_

_I kind of freaked out. I thought you’d read my mind._

_LOL!_

_Nope, no mind-reading over here._

_I just tend to think a lot._

_Sometimes too much._

_That’s a lie, I tend to overthink everything._

_Please stop me if I’m babbling._

That raised his spirits a little and he could feel his lips quirking up into a smile.

_At least one of us is contributing to the conversation._

_So, if we’re being honest. I was thinking about calling it quits._

_I sense a “but” here?_ 😉

_I don’t know now._

_Your babbling was kind of funny._

_I may have cracked a smile._

_That’s…good?_

_Kind of embarrassing that I babbled at you._

_But smiling is good. Smiling we can work with._ 😊

_Besides which, talking to a stranger is good._

_I’m not sure that’s not what my Mom said when I was growing up._

_XD_

_Yeah, talking to strangers whilst growing up = Bad_

_Talking to a stranger about problems as an adult = Good_

_You can tell them anything you like, then if you feel you’ve overshared you can leave._

_Since you don’t see them in real life, it’s easier than talking to friends or family._

_You don’t have to fear their judgement._

_Have you talked to a lot of strangers then?_

_Nope, but talked to counsellors before._

_Had…problems growing up._

_Middle child syndrome._

_You have siblings?_

_Yep, brother and a sister._

_I’m the one in the middle._ 😉

_(As if that wasn’t obvious from the above statement)_

_You don’t?_

_Nope, only child._

_It was kind of lonely._

_Didn’t your parents want more?_

_Mom was single by the time I came along._

_Sorry._ ☹

_Don’t be._

_She had to work a lot to keep us going._

_I had to learn to be independent._

_Sounds like you grew up quick._

_That’s an understatement._

_It helped shape my future career though._

_I started drawing as a distraction,_

_Then when I got older it evolved into ink._

_You have tattoos?! That’s so cool!!_

His stomach rumbling distracted him.

After the nerves had lifted as they chatted his appetite had also returned, and Blake realised just how hungry he was.

_I tattoo for a living. But let talk about that another day._

_I need to grab something to eat._

_Speak to you soon?_

_That would be nice._

_Speak to you later._ 😊

Blake tried to ignore the warm fluttering feeling the last message invoked.

The conversation had been, nice. He was simply happy that he hadn’t ended it in tears or vomiting. Blake sighed, maybe if he repeated the lie enough, he could convince himself to believe it.

Stupid Lovelink. Stupid Cat.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just some mindless drabble on a made up conversation between the MC and Blake.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since so much of Blake's chat with you is sexy talk and innuendo I struggled to find anything to transcribe so I started making up my own conversations based on the snippets I can glean.

Blake had decided that one conversation a day was good exposure to the cutthroat world of dating. If their last conversation had been anything to go by then this match was happy for him to set the pace in their conversations and they’d made no attempts to hurry him into meeting face to face, which he appreciated. He’d been sitting at the reception desk at work, scrolling through their previous conversation to see what he’d agreed to when the icon next to their avatar turned green to indicate they were online.

Figuring it was better than what he’d been doing for the last half an hour (listening to someone scream as Trish attempted to give them their first tattoo) Blake decided he should be the one to initiate the contact this time.

_Hi, was just thinking about you!_

_Nice thoughts I hope?_

_Do people usually think bad thoughts about you?_

_I’m sure I have more than my fair share of them_

_I believe I promised you more about what I did._

_Figure now is as good time as any, we’ve got a first timer in store, screaming the place down._

_You’re a welcome distraction._

_How do you work with someone screaming in your ear?_

_Usually with earplugs if they hang around._

_Mostly they lose their nerve and do a runner, so we take a minimum deposit up front._

_What if they want it back?_

_It’s made clear its non-refundable._

_Them chickening out isn’t on us, we’ve already incurred costs in ink and needles._

_Plus, we lose the time for another appointment for someone who will stay in place._

_Fair enough._

_Do you specialise in certain tattoos?_

_I do, well I did, couples tattoos._

_You did?_

_Kind of hard to hold a needle when your hands won’t stop shaking._

_Also, difficult to celebrate someone else’s happiness when your heart feels broken._

_Do you have any tattoos?_

_A couple, not in places where they can’t be hidden for work._

_Dress codes suck._

_Nothing in honour of an ex though._

_I know it’s cutting the conversation short,_

_but do you mind if we take a quick break here?_

_Did I say something wrong?_

_I’ll explain next time._

_Talk to you soon!_

Blake logged off the app without waiting to see their goodbye and sat for a moment, considering the emotions that last comment from his match had invoked. He rolled up his left sleeve almost by force of habit, gazing at the cover-up Keanu had done to obliterate the song lyrics that had previously sat there. It had seemed like such a romantic idea at the time, the first song that Jordan and he had danced to, their song, a song which he now couldn’t stand to hear.

For the first time since the door had slammed shut Blake allowed himself a stab of anger that Jordan had poisoned his life so spectacularly that an offhand comment could push him back into thinking about his ex. It was closely followed by the guilt that he’d been so abrupt in ending a conversation with someone who was trying to help him break free of such thinking. He owed them at least a few kind words, lest they spend the rest of the day concerned they’d upset him.

Sighing he reloaded the app, it opened on their last conversation, though he’d received a few more messages since he’d left.

_Hello?_

_I’m sorry?_

_Please let me know what I said wrong?_

_You didn’t say anything wrong._

_I just got a bit overwhelmed with a bad memory._

_Need to sort some emotional stuff out._

The icon showed they were online, so they’d see the messages and hopefully be reassured. Blake closed the app before he felt compelled to add more and they both started apologising for mistakes, real or perceived.

The sound of a door opening made him look up from his phone and he realised Keanu was standing in the doorway of his room, staring at Trish’s closed door and the sound of screams that still came from within. 

As they both watched the door was yanked open and the client within fled, still somehow screaming, out the front door of the shop and down the street.

“Did we get his address?”

Trish appeared in the doorway, still masked and gloved up, pointing in the direction of the coat-stand, where Blake realised the man had left quite a nice leather jacket in his haste to leave the premises. They’d give it until the evening to see if he gathered his nerve enough to return to collect his belongs, otherwise they’d post it to the address he’d provided on the legal documents he had filled out before going in for the appointment. Checking to ensure they were filled out properly Keanu nodded, before retrieving the article for safekeeping, lest someone else try to walk off with it.

Blake stared out the window at the people passing by, trying to distract himself from what he was going to say the next time he talked to his match.


End file.
